Viewing Guide: Idol Gives Back Week!

Some of you might think that running an organization like the Idol Pool would require business savvy, competitive instincts, perfect pitch, and a heart of steel. But it’s not true. In fact, it only takes one Josh Groban and 15-20 headbanded African children to get this Idol Pool Master’s tears flowing. So Idol Gives Back Week is greeted at Pool Headquarters with anticipation and lots of extra Kleenex. And no—dirty birds—it’s not just because Vanessa Hudgens is supposed to appear this year.

The truth is, your Idol Pool Master loves to give back. In fact, I love giving back so much that I’m hereby announcing a new initiative: the first ever Idol Pool Blog Comment Charity Challenge! Here’s how it works. Your Idol Master will give $1 (out of his own pocket) for every comment posted on the blog this week which he deems funny or interesting. That’s it: post a funny comment and the IPM will give a dollar. Or don’t, and have the malaria epidemic on your conscience.

Speaking of, the stars are swarming like flies to this year’s Idol Gives Back! Have you seen the list? Robin Williams, Celine Dion, Forest Whitaker, Billy Crystal, Dane Cook, Kiefer Sutherland, Terri Hatcher (singing!), IPM favoite Ashley Tisdale, Jennifer Connolly, Elliott Yamin, Fantasia, Amy Adams, Bono, Brad Pitt and a bad green hat, Reese Witherspoon, Sarah Silverman, Miley Cyrus, Mariah Carey, Eli Manning, Peyton Manning, the Beckhams, Fergie duetting with Heart, Chris Daughtry, Annie Lennox, John Legend, Snoop Dogg, Maroon 5, Gloria Estefan, and, fresh from texting her boyfriend that he's dumped, Carrie Underwood (singing George Michael, I’m told). Oh, and did we mention the appearances by two-time Grammy award winner Barack Obama, Grammy award winner Hillary Clinton, and presumptive Republican nominee John Sidney McCain? We’re audacious enough to hope that J.S. McCain will pledge an American Idol presence on Fox for the next hundred years. And that Hillary will release the rights to her songbook.

Wait, have we even mentioned Tuesday’s Inspiration-Themed show, or Thursday’s appearance by Jordin Sparks? (Jordin, by the way, has predicted a David-David final this year.) Given that you’ll be committing four and half hours to Idol this week, we’ll keep this post short. Just a little advice for the contestants:

1. Kristy Lee: everyone in our pool except Suzy (and the straight men) wants your performance to go something like this. 28 of us didn’t even have you in our top 12. I know you want to sing “Amazing Grace” for the third time this year, but here’s the dilemma: can you sing that AND wear a plunging neckline?
2. Syesha: sure, you can sing Wind Beneath My Wings. But only if you include this move (skip to 4:16).
3. David Cook: tough week for you, man. Part of me wants you to take “You Raise Me Up”, ditch the children’s choir, and add an electric guitar. Surely someone has a cover version you could steal. I’m not sure what this would do to your rocker cred, though, so maybe you should just sing something by Jars of Clay.
4. Michael Johns: Guess you shouldn’t have blown “We Are the Champions” on Year You Were Born Week. I’d say just keep tussling that hair of yours. It’s still the best thing you’ve got going.
5. Jason: Sing “What a Wonderful World” acoustic. No question about it.
6. Brooke: I’d say just do what you normally do. Sing something forgettable, have Paula tell you how beautiful you are, get criticized by Simon, and then start talking back so much that the judges and Ryan can hardly get a word in edgewise.
7. Carly: You’ll probably want to save “Hero” for Mariah Carey week next week. But you’ve got the biggest voice left in the competition and you should use it. How about "You'll Never Walk Alone"? Or go Irish and sing “Danny Boy”. Either way, I won’t have to wait until Wednesday to start crying.
8. David Archuletta: Everyone knows this is the week you were born for. Resist the urge to sing “One Day More” from Les Mis. We know you want to. This is your chance to sing “Bridge Over Troubled Waters” and make us forget about Clay once and for all.

OK, friends. Don't forget the Blog Comment Charity Challenge. 1 comment = $1. That's enough to give a child in Africa four days' worth of food, headbands, and choir lessons. We're all in this together, Pool Members.

April 2 Standings

1. Stephen - 130 points (348 max) – no change

2. Jennie L. - 128 points (352 max) – up from 7th

3. Meredith - 126 points (344 max) - down from 2nd

4. Karen - 125 points (328 max) – up from 6th

5. Amy L-P. - 123 points (341 max) – up from 8th

6. Dave L. - 121 points (345 max) – up from 13th

7. Julie R. - 121 points (339 max) – down from 3rd

8. Stephanie - 121 points (318 max) – down from 4th

9. Cathleen - 121 points (294 max) – down from 5th

10. Ryan – 120 points (338 max) – up from 14th

11. Julie H. - 119 points (343 max) - up from T-16th

12. Jan W. - 119 points (337 max) – up from 22nd

13. Yvonne - 119 points (322 max) – up from 15th

14. Lisa S. - 118 points (342 max) - up from 23rd

15. Suzy M. - 118 points (329 max) – up from 24th

16. Amy Y. - 118 points (308 max) – down from 9th

17. Lisa B. - 117 points (335 max) - down from T-11th

18. Marybeth & Lucy - 117 points (320 max) – up from 26th

19. Mandy - 117 points (311 max) – down from 10th

20. Matty - 117 points (284 max) - down from T-11th

21. Don - 116 points (334 max) – up from 30th

22. Aneesha - 115 points (339 max) – up from 36th

23. Suzanne - 115 points (318 max) – up from 41st

T-24. Alieda - 114 points (332 max) - down from T-16th
T-24. Kristin - 114 points (332 max) - down from T-16th

T-26. Jan M. - 114 points (325 max) - down from T-16th
T-26. Scott - 114 points (325 max) – down from T-16th

28. Brian - 114 points (287 max) - down from T-16th

29. Kara - 113 points (337 max) – up from 48th

30. Liz - 113 points (324 max) – down from 25th

31. Andy - 112 points (323 max) – up from 55th

32. Denis - 112 points (306 max) – down from 27th

T-33. Corona - 111 points (329 max) – down from 31st
T-33. Jaime - 111 points (329 max) – down from T-28th
T-33. Marcia - 111 points (329 max) - down from T-28th

36. Cindy - 111 points (316 max) - down from 32nd

37. Team O'Brien - 110 points (321 max) - up from 40th

T-38. Damian - 110 points (315 max) - up from T-42nd
T-38. Jean Claude - 110 points (315 max) - up from T-42nd
T-38. Melissa - 110 points (315 max) – no change

41. Jenny M. - 110 points (300 max) – down from T-38th

42. Stacie - 109 points (282 max) - up from 47th

43. Jane - 108 points (326 max) – up from 49th

44. Team Ringey - 108 points (313 max) – up from 50th

T-45. Katie K. - 107 points (325 max) – up from T-52nd
T-45. Mike L. - 107 points (325 max) – up from 54th

47. Michelle - 107 points (310 max) - up from T-52nd

48. Peter - 107 points (288 max) – up from 57th

49. Matt - 106 points (311 max) - down from 33rd

50. Jen S. - 106 points (284 max) – down from 35th

51. Paul F. - 106 points (227 max) – down from 34th

52. Rich - 105 points (323 max) – up from 62nd

53. Team 'Tini - 105 points (316 max) – up from T-60th

54. Kathryn - 105 points (310 max) – down from 37th

55. Jon - 105 points (302 max) – up from 66th

56. Will B. - 105 points (289 max) – up from T-60th

T-57. Jill - 105 points (270 max) – down from 46th
T-57. Paul P. - 105 points (270 max) - down from T-42nd

59. Julie K. - 105 points (262 max) - down from 45th

60. Michael W. - 103 points (270 max) – down from 51st

61. Missy - 102 points (275 max) - down from 56th

62. Brooke - 101 points (306 max) - up from 71st

63. Judy - 101 points (204 max) – down from 59th

64. Emily - 100 points (305 max) – up from 65th

65. Dave S. - 100 points (288 max) – down from 63rd

66. Anh - 100 points (281 max) – down from 64th

67. Lance - 100 points (260 max) – no change

68. Dina - 99 points (287 max) – no change

69. Katy L. - 98 points (282 max) – no change

70. Sean - 97 points (287 max) – no change

71. Cristina - 96 points (280 max) – down from 58th

72. Kendra - 96 points (267 max) – no change

73. Julie W. - 94 points (236 max) – no change

74. Will A. – 92 points (289 max) – no change

75. Neisha - 87 points (197 max) – no change

76. Vote For The Worst - 80 points (190 max) – up from last

77. Chris F. - 79 points (233 max) – no change

78. Mike & Suzy - 76 points (211 max) – no from 76th

Juliana Tarris Auditions for American Idol

IPM Note - In our annual trend of real life people experiencing American Idol first hand (also see Marybeth's post last year titled "What it's like to Attend and Idol Taping"), we bring you this exclusive - Juliana Tarris Auditions for American Idol:


So…let me start by saying that what they show on tv isn’t entirely what happens in real life (shocker).

In my experience, I can only speak for the initial round (there are many rounds to get to the 3 judges, but it doesn’t really show them all on tv). My last year to audition was ’07 due to the fact that I was turning 28 that year and that’s the cutoff to try out. They raised it from 24 a few years ago up to 28 (which is cool) so I knew it was my last shot. I also knew that I had hardly any chance of making it far, but I would’ve always wondered if I hadn’t tried.

So, I talked two of my friends from my current a cappella group in NYC to come try out with me. I really had to convince them, but they finally gave in. Of all the cities with auditions in ’07, Philly was the closest to NYC. It was the last of all the cities, in August 2007.

I called Sonia (one of my best friends from college) to see if we could stay with her in her apt in Philly so it was perfect! The three of us took the luxurious Greyhound (awww, yeahhh) to Philly on Friday night. The next morning, I had read online that we needed to be at the Wachovia center (where the Flyers and 76ers play) by 6am. Sonia got us up at 4:30am and we took the SEPTA (Philly subway) to the center. There wasn’t a soul at the station – kinda scary. We needed to get there to collect the sacred wristbands. They give out wristbands mostly to monitor how many people come to audition I think.

By the time we arrived (about 5am I think?), there were already thousands of people there, congregated in the parking lot. They assigned us various sections within the parking lot. All of the sections were surrounded by movable metal fences. I felt like cattle in a pen (one of many times I felt like this over the wknd). We basically waited for about 4-5 hrs until we started moving inside the center. All around me was the most diverse crowd I have ever ever seen. People of all sizes and shapes, every skin color, prim and proper, goth and pierced, athletic, preppy, etc. There were people there with a guardian (you had to bring one if you were under 18). Those poor, patient guardians. Wow. There were people sleeping on the asphalt, dancing, playing games, meeting friends, playing video games, reading books, etc. We didn’t know how long it was going to take. All we knew was that we were surrounded by thousands of people and everyone needed a wristband. There were news helicopters flying above, and news cameras around us interviewing us. It was a bit much for the morning. I was already for lunch and it was about 10am. A couple of smart vendors set up in the lot near us with hotdogs and stuff. I don’t think they were Idol-related or anything.



All around me all morning there were people practicing their songs (even though actual auditions were on Monday morning). Some quietly, and some at the top of their lungs. Over and over. The sun had not even COME UP yet and I was ready to throw my water bottle at them it was SO annoying. Some people had amazing voices, some horrible. It’s funny how literally everyone around me thought they were good enough to put all this time and energy into this audition. For some, I just wanted to turn around and say “Really? Yeahhh, let me just save you the time and you can go home.” Is that mean? Yeah, I know. It’s just some people are SO delusional!! I know I’m not the best singer ever but I’d like to think I’m not tone deaf. And some of these people are!!

Speaking of the effort people will go to, I heard people around me talking about how they came from Minnesota, Florida, Maine, and so on. Philly was the closest audition city for them that year (or they decided to come to more than one city for auditions). It’s amazing how much time and money people spend to travel to these auditions.

Anyways, once we FINALLY got inside, it was a fairly quick process of showing ID to prove age (you needed two forms so everyone had passports and birth certificates – serious stuff to be carrying around!). Once they checked IDs and you handed in your ‘sign your life away’ form, you were free to go. It used to be that you slept over at the auditions until the actual singing, but they changed the rules. THANK GOD. Oh and by the way, the “sign your life away” form’s small print was so disturbing. I wish I still had it. It said things along the lines of they could pretty much make stuff up about you and make fun of you and you couldn’t sue them.

So, we had a nice wknd visiting with Sonia and she dropped us off again at 4:30am on Monday morning for the actual audition. Again, we were in pens outside forever and then slowly, slowly marched inside. People went ALL OUT for this audition. I mean I saw tight sequined dresses and HUGE heels, guys in suits, many people in crazy wigs, etc. I’m sure you see all the costumes on the show. People with signs around there necks of how far they’ve come and stuff.

They filed us into the center and we each got a seat ticket. Pretty much the ENTIRE center was filled. By the time we got into the seats it was around 11am. Ryan Seacrest came onto the center of the floor and said that this was the biggest turnout of any city EVER. Great, just my luck. There were 17,000 people auditioning (and 2,000 chaperones).

Then, they swooped these huge cameras all over the center and made us chant silly thing like “We love American Idol, wooooooooo” and “The City of Brotherly Love, wooooooo” over and over and over and over. They kept saying, you guys weren’t loud enough. You guys didn’t enunciate enough (hi, there are 19k of us), we need to do another take, we need to do another take, and so on. Then when they FINALLY got those takes right, we were ordered to sing the chorus of “I Love Rock and Roll” literally 25 times until they got that take right too. I stopped singing that after the 2nd time. Why would I want to ruin my voice? So dumb. Later when I saw this televised, they showed our chanting and the song for like 5 seconds. Uggh.

Anyways, about a dozen tables were set up the floor and we slowly filed down to the floor to sing. Between each table was a black sheet. It’s a good thing we practiced singing in Sonia’s apt with the tv at full blast because it was SO distracting. Rows of four people auditioned at each table. So at any given moment, 48 people were lined up (in front of the 12 tables). You all took turns in your group of 4 singing for the judge behind the table. These were just random “music producers” we were told.




By the time we got down to the floor it was 5:20pm. Over 12 hrs since we arrived that morning!!!! The knots and anxiety in my stomach were at the worst levels of all time at that point. At about 2pm I just wanted the whole thing to be over!! I was BEYOND nervous. I’d never felt that before.

So, everyone in the seats can see and hear you auditioning on the floor. We noticed that a lot of girls did the Jennifer Hudson big solo from Dreamgirls. Actually, a lot of girls did screechy songs. Uggh. Once the judges hear you, you are either sent home or given a “golden ticket” – the yellow paper that means you made it to the next round. Only 250-300 golden tickets were given out that day. Great odds, huh?? The crowd started to notice that almost every person in a costume (good or bad singer) got a golden ticket. They were booed every time they were handed that ticket. That just confirmed that it’s not always about talent. It’s about gimmicks.

When I got to my judge she looked SO bored. She was literally falling asleep. They should’ve let the judges take breaks. They had sat there for hours (we could see when they switched out and it was not often). She looked like a librarian or something. Anyways, I intro’d myself and sang for 30 seconds (we were told that was our time limit and we should have multiple songs prepped if they ask for another). I later found out that the judges’ rules were all over the map. Some judges let you tell your life story, some permitted no talking at ALL, some judges let people sing their whole songs, and some for 30 seconds. So unfair! Idol definitely breaks their own rules whenever they want to. Ew.

I did what I thought was my best and then let the girl next to me sing. She did this weird wide legged stance with arms waving above her and sang this high piercing song that was awful. When she was done she gave the judge a long hurried speech about how she came from Poland, etc. and basically BEGGED for a golden ticket. The sleepy judge hesitated a lot and then was like ehh, okay. We all watched in horror and jealousy. When the three of us next to her walked away. This one guy said, “wow, she butchered Celine Dion.” I was like “that was Celine Dion!?!?”

We were told that the people with the golden tickets had to go sing for other random producers and then about half of them get to sing in front of the 3 judges the following wknd. (VERY unlike what they show on tv). When I watched the Philly auditions on tv, I was SO pissed to see the horrid people that made it past me. Just to make good tv!! Not fair. But Idol can do what they want. It’s their show, their rules. I mean, there were people shown on tv that were even over 28 years old!!! I don’t understand how they even got wristbands when we had to show ID? They both were wearing costume-y outfits though. Man, I should’ve dressed up I guess.

Anyways, I guess that’s it in a nutshell. It was like rolling the dice – such a crapshoot to audition. I just had to try…

April 1 Viewer's Guide

You may think you know this week’s theme since Dolly Parton is the guest judge. No, idol fans, it isn’t JUST country. Our Idols will be singing Dolly Parton songs!




Our insiders tell us the contestants were locked in a room with their weapon of choice to determine who will get to sing “I Will Always Love You”. Rest easy, David Archuleta won. His weapon? Just his infectious and humble giggle.

The remaining 8 contestants will all be singing “9 to 5”, except for Kristy Lee Cook. She received permission to fly to Iraq and sing “Tie a Yellow Ribbon” (from Dolly’s For God & Country album) surrounded by all 150,000+ American Troops stationed there. We look forward to that live feed.

We also have the inside scoop regarding the group number on elimination night. Many of you may not be familiar with Dolly Parton’s dinner theatre, Dixie Stampede. Think Medieval Nights in all red, white and blue, with fried chicken and biscuits. The finale to this show is a little number by Ms. Parton called “Color Me America.” Check out the video below. Surely, the Idols version will find a way to be even more American.





In other Idol News, Melinda Doolittle and Chris Richardson win the prize for the most demeaning follow-up to their stint on Idol. This is worse than the Ford commercials. Really, does Melinda have to keep eating the ice cream for that long?

Enjoy Dolly night!